Category Archives: Chrissie

In and Out

Tomorrow is the big day. In a very bizarre and ironic twist of fate, I have to get two teeth removed and one tooth implanted. That just seems wrong, doesn’t it? How can I have too many teeth and not enough teeth all at the same time?!?!? I guess some of us are just extra lucky. Don’t hate me. Really.

I’m actually ok with the removal part. I’ve had teeth pulled before and it isn’t that bad. Ok, it’s bad but not THAT bad. Two more wisdom teeth will be yanked tomorrow leaving only one left. Gotta same something for later, right? And while I’m under, I’m going to have the first of four implants started. Yup. Four. Don’t ask. Like I said, just crazy lucky in the teeth department.

I have stocked up with rented videos – Season One of Mad Men and Dexter. I have prepped ice bags. My fridge is bursting with pudding, yogurt and mac & cheese. Must remember to tape notes to said food items so my husband/voracious children do not eat my special gumming food. Got all my meds lined up and ready to ingest. Bring on the dental work! Bring it!

(Or not. Gulp!)

Strangely Efficient

I’ve been hit by a “doing” bug lately.  I want to get stuff done.  Finish projects, get organized, and tackle the untidy heaps around my house.  Odd, huh?  Usually when this bug hits me, I get all excited and started and am then struck down by a horrible cold during which time all my hard work falls apart.  As I lay on the sofa, watching my house decent into chaos, I vow never again to try and take control.  Obviously, I have forgotten this vow because I’m feeling invincible!  (Probably should not be saying this with H1N1 circulating but I’m a bit of a dare devil at heart you know.)

So, I finished painting that last few bare spots my beautiful butter yellow.  I weeded down my magazine pile that accumulated while I was in Hawaii.  I actually cleaned the bathroom even though I do not have a guest coming over.  I know!  That’s how invincible I am feeling.   I’m still running around like crazy during the week trying to get this whole school schedule sorted out but I’m kind of starting to enjoy it.  I’m a notorious home-body and I forget that it’s nice to get out of the house too.  This week looks like gorgeous fall weather and I’m getting revved up for the big fall cleanup of our yard.  I know Kevin must be dreading it but I love pruning roses, raking leaves, and packing away the squirt guns.  I do love me some tidiness.

To add to my general super power feeling, I have officially finished my very first Christmas present.  Yes, that’s right.  One down, too many to count left to go!  It feels so good to start the Christmas pile in the present closet.  I’m tempted to mail it right now but I figure that may be a bit rash.

Cleaning, organizing, producing, happy….. oh yeah, I’m so getting the flu this week.  Ah well, until then, I will continue this reign of efficiency!  Onward!  Hooray!

Routine Needed

I am still struggling with our new morning routine.  I am so not a morning person.  I like to start slow and gradually build speed.  Over the summer, we’d get out of the house around 10am.  Now, we have to be moving by 7:30.  Talk about a shock to the system.  Luckily, Leina is a total early bird so she pops out of bed at 6am and hits the ground running.  Most mornings, Kevin and I are the ones dragging and it’s Leina urging us to get going.  What a reversal of  roles!

Aside from the early start, the girls both adore school.  Good teachers, good friends and lots of recess time.  I thought I would have more free time on my hands but apparently, this is not to be.  Instead, our calendar is suddenly packed with school activities and finding a quiet moment is harder than ever.  I guess I’m in the big leagues now.

Kat and I have begun our annual Christmas Craft season and it feels so good to get my hands busy again.  I have several different project scattered throughout the house.  I love picking something up and working on it for a few minutes or so.  It feel like such a luxury to curl up on the sofa and stitch for a few minutes.  Just heavenly.  However, as these are mostly Christmas presents, I will be unable to post pictures for a while.  I suppose I will just have to amuse you with my witty banter instead.  So sorry.  Please bare with me!

Really.

The girls loved their week of zoo camp and I survived as well.  Drop off was easy but pickup? Beyond crazy.  I had  no idea so many people try to go to the zoo in the summer.  It was unreal.  Even worse was the fashion disaster I saw on the last day.

I dropped off the girls at this little side gate, not the main entrance to the zoo.  It’s down the hill a bit and around a corner which is nice because you avoid the chaos at the ticket counter.  I had just waved so long to my little ones and turned around to hike back up the hill when I noticed the girl in front of me.  Now, remember, we were walking up the hill so I had a pretty good view of what was going on here.  Namely, she was wearing her underwear.  This is good, right?  Nope.   Because that’s all she was wearing on her bottom half.  A pair of very small, very faded, very tight cotton underwear.

Now, before you get too excited, let me modify your mental image.  Take away the Victoria Secret’s model and replace it with a 18 to 20 something girl pushing her kid in a stroller.  Add a nice juicy roll of tummy and back fat spilling out of the top, a spectacular collection of stretch marks and you’d be seeing what I saw.  Scary huh?  I, personally, was mesmerized.  I mean, underwear?  Really?  But the farther up that hill we walked the more sure if it I was.  They were made out of cotton with a thick elastic white waistband and were boy short cut.  Not loose boxers but skin tights tidy whites.  She spent most of the walk uphill trying to dig them out of her behind and pull them down as they rode up between her thighs with no luck.  They were skin tight and so I  can say with quite some degree of confidence that she was not wearing anything under them.  But then, why would she?  ‘Cause that’s just crazy to wear underwear under underwear.   Right?  I’m so confused.

But the truely horrifying part?  The thing that tipped me over the edge?  She was walking into the zoo, pushing her stroller, and talking to her mom and dad!!!!  Yes, her parents let her out of the house wearing only underwear!!  I have no idea what my mom would do if I showed up in public with her wearing only my underwear but I’m pretty  sure walking calmly beside me would not be one of her reactions.

Come on people.  Pull it together.  Put some clothes over your undergarments when you head for the zoo.  Really.

The Chickens of My Dreams

My dad went to the San Diego Fair the other day and found the chicken coop of my dreams.  It will fit in the back of his truck and he could drive it right up.  Be still my beating heart.  Now, all I have to do is convince my HOA to let me have my feathered friends……

The Thelma And Lousie chicken coop. Someday.  Someday.

What Was I Thinking

I am drained.  Exhausted.  Tapped out.  Dry to the thigh.

I know, that’s a weird one right?  Dry to the thigh?  What does that mean?  Leina coined it when we were planting our seeds.  She’d check the dirt of  the bean pot and declare it was dry to the thigh and needed some water.   Clearly, this child has never looked closely at my thighs because they are anything but dry.  I’d go with juicy and jiggly and overstuffed.

Oh yes, did I mention that I also went shopping for a new bathing suit today?  I know, I know, bathing suit shopping is not something you should try and do on the spur of the moment with two small children when you are totally and completely tired out.  In fact, bathing suit shopping should be banned all together.  Instead, a little swimsuit wagon should pull up discretely to your house once a year so you could try on suits in the privacy of your own house where you could moan and sob without having the people in the next stall knock on your door and demand if everything was alright.

But I do not yet rule this world so instead we must all attempt to try on bathing suits in little stalls with lots of surrounding mirrors and no high heeled shoes to help you along.  And small children.  Who insist on opening and closing the co-ed changing room door right when you are at  your least presentable which is, lets face, at every moment when swimsuits are at hand.  My children did, however, redeem themselves by telling me I looked so pretty in the suits I was trying on that I decided to take them home with me instead of ditching them by the large screen TVs.  Joking!

As if that isn’t bad enough, you then have to pay for the swimsuit.  And it ain’t cheap!  I got one suit and the total was $80.  Um, hello?  Eighty buck for a piece of spandex that shows off the worse bits of me?  Really?  But lets face it, after the agony to the dressing room, the opening and closing of the door, the moaning and the weeping, and those awful mirror, the idea of shopping around and having to go through that all over again and again is just too much to take so instead you grab the suit that was the least awful and run for the register relieved that at least that’s over for the year.   Of course, you still have to wear the thing.  In public.  I front of other people, who I guarantee will be skinnier than you.  Yeah, today may have been a bad day to try and find swimwear.

But honestly, I am not happy with June.  There is too much to do and not enough time for me to lie around and read books.  June, so far, has been filled with end of the year school events, puking, doctor appointments, puking, graduations, puking in cars, and drama.  Yes, drama.  I prefer my drama on The Hills not in my house.  So June?  You can just pack up and take your sensitive little stomach home.  And take your stinkin’ swimsuits with you.

(The above entry was written with just a schooch of grumpiness.  Please do not be alarmed.  Or, not too alarmed.)