It’s over.

So, very very over.

Pack my bags and send me a one-way ticket to anywhere ’cause I’m done people.

On Saturday, Kulia figured out how to climb out of her crib. Lord help me. She’s free.

We had no warning people. No false tries, no cryptic reference to flying to coop. Nothing.

Ready for the back-story? Kulia has been fighting her naps. I guess she feels that as a fully grown 2 yr old, she no longer needs these pesky rest periods. HA! She has also been crabby, testy, and complaining her ears hurt. So I guess there’s a possibility she has a raging ear infection and every time she lies down it hurts so she start crying in pain. Whatever. Back to me.

The last few days is seems whenever I put her down for her nap and she immediately popped up and started crying. Normally, she rolls over and goes to sleep. But suddenly, all this crying. So I give her an extra song, some pats, tell her to go to sleep, and close the door. Saturday was no different. Crying, fussing, ear tugging – my good little napper had mysteriously disappeared. After wrangling Leina into her bed, (she too believes that as a full grown 4 yr old, nap times are for babies which she clearly is not), I headed downstairs with Kevin for some much needed time off.

Before too long, we heard thumps and bumps coming from Leina’s room. This is nothing new. Leina and I have established a detente. As long as she stays in her room and is quiet, I turn a blind eye to the fact that she is not actually “sleeping”. As long as I get my down time, I’m happy people. So the bumps and thumps I try to ignore. However, as they got louder and louder I knew we’d have to step in. Leina awake is bearable. Kulia awake because her sister is making too much noise is not. So I sent Kevin upstairs to threaten Leina with whatever he could think of to get her to keep quiet. Selling to gypsies, tying her to the bed, burning her blanket, whatever. I need my down time, ok? Stop looking at me like that.

Kevin went up and not 2 seconds he called down to me, “Um, Chrissie, we have a problem.” With vision of crayons on the wall, a bed frame broken from excessive jumping, a fish out of water, I rushed upstairs. What I saw was even worse. There was Leina, as expected, awake in her room. No crayons, no broken metal, no flopping fish. Instead, Kevin stood there with Kulia in his arms. My first thought was, “how did Leina get Kulia out of her crib?” The thought of Kulia scaling her wooden bars never even crossed my mind.

Kevin says when he headed up the stairs, he heard the sound of little feet running. Upon reaching the landing, he caught Leina going back into her room. He was ready to unleash the threat of gypsies and Leina must have seen the stern look in his eyes because she immediately threw her sister to the wolves.

Raising her hands in front of her, she blurted out, “Kulia climbed out of her crib!”

This had the desired effect as Kevin turned his focus from Leina to Kulia’s room. Her door was closed and all was quiet. Opening the door, Kevin found Kulia standing very quietly in her dark, nap inducing room. Standing outside of her crib people. After questioning, the truth came out. Kulia, unable to sleep, decided to climb from her crib, leave her room, and go into Leina’s. Leina was more then happy to find her sister at her door. Instead of raising the alarm that the baby had done a crib-break, Leina invited her in and they started playing. Hence the louder than normal thumps and bumps we heard.

I put Leina back in her room and Kevin went to rock with Kulia.

“Kulia”, he began, “you have to stay in your cribby. No climb out, ok?”

“OK, I no climb out.” Kulia agreed. After a few more rocks, she added under her breath: “Next time, me hide.” Help me people.

So this afternoon I’m taking her to the doctor and praying that she has a horrible ear infection. Maybe two if I’m lucky. Then there is hope that once they clear up, she’ll willingly lie down and take a nap again. Because people, Kulia able to get out of her crib is the end of the world as I know it.