Category Archives: Family Matters

Glowing

I am a real believer in true love Princess Bride style. Don’t know if I believe you only have one soul mate thought. I mean, what are the odds that you’d ever meet them? But I do believe that there is something magical that happens between the right two people.

I’ve been thinking about this because of an old friend of mine. Now, please bear in mind that many people tell me I have swiss cheese memory and am slightly delusional in that I often clearly remember things that never happened and completely block out other episodes totally. (I pay no mind to these people who accuse me of this but they make up a frighteningly large majority of my acquaintances.) So, this is just my own demented memory of high school. If I malign or besmirch (what a great word – makes me think of mashing green goop onto white silk) anyone, I humbly apologize.

So I had this good friend in high school. Smart, funny, caring, rich (hey now, lets me honest, that’s a bonus) just an all-around great friend but he didn’t believe in marriage. More particularly, he didn’t believe in true love Princess Bride style. He was very cynical about the whole find-someone-you-love-so-much-you-get-married-and-stay-in-love-forever fairytale. I think he believed in love, in general, but was doubtful that you could love someone so much it lasted forever. So he had a few girlfriends, went on some dates, but remained pretty much skeptical about true love Princess Bride style.

Then he went to college and something magical happened. You see, there, he met HER. Yup, you guessed it. He met someone so wonderfully special that all his doubts and fears and beliefs about love were stripped away. For when true love finds you, there is no room for doubt.

I went to a different college so I didn’t get to see the courtship or the slow realization that she was The One. But I did get to know her and see them together and there is no doubt in my mind that they are It. They are the poo. Take a sniff. (Can you tell I was watching Bring It On last weekend?)

So now, he glows. I swear I am not making this up. He watches her and he glows and he smiles and every sharp angle is soothed by her. I don’t know if she realizes it – how much she has changed him. I mean, she didn’t know him before her. (That could only happen in a bad Star Trek episode with a tear in the space-time continum which, lets face it, rarely ever really happens.)

But I know.

Got a picture from them today and he’s still glowing. Ain’t love grand?

Crazy All Around

Yesterday was crazy weather day here. It started out sunny. Then these clouds moved in and we had a thunderstorm with big booms and flashes of lightening. Watching out our office window, we saw lightening strike down by the river front. Turns out it hit a playground and left a four inch deep hole in the asphalt. (Don’t worry, all the kiddies were inside at their desks.) The thunderstorm only lasted ten minutes or so and then the clouds blew through and it started to clear. Right when I thought everything was normal, down comes this torrential rain that turns into hail. Absolutely crazy I tell you.

And it’s not just the weather that’s gone nuts. There have been two shootings downtown. Now, you have to realize that Portland’s downtown blocks are a mere ten by ten grid. On Monday, at 11:30am, a man and a woman were walking by the Pioneer Square, pretty much dead center of downtown, and a man approached them asking them for drugs. The couple refused, and the man pulled a gun and shot the man point blank five or six times in front of dozens of witnesses. He then hoped into a car and took off. The man died later that day. Then, yesterday, three men walked into the Wells Fargo over on 4th at 2pm, shot a few rounds into the air, and demanded money. One or two fled into a nearby apartment building where they took hostages and were surrounded by police. I guess it all ended peacefully. In a big city, this may seem like nothing but this is not a big city. Crazy I tell you.

How do I know all this, you ask me? It’s not because I read the newspaper, listen to the news or radio stations. Oh no, I have discovered a new (and very addictive) pastime. Police scanners. Yes, that’s right. Thanks to the joy of the Internet, you can now listen to the Portland Police scanners over streaming video. They even provide a handy-dandy reference sheet of codes and lingo so you can understand what’s being said. It is so very very neat.

Have decided to quit my job and become a police dispatcher as soon as I figure out where to apply.

Rich! Rich!

We are rich, rich I tell you!

Over the weekend, Kevin & I did our taxes and, for the first time, realized the joy of home ownership. You see, 2001 was our first full year in our little house. Before that, we were royally screwed by the tax man.

Our first year of marriage, we bit it big time. Married, we were hit with the marriage penalty, and could only get the measly marital standard deduction which was way less than our old individual deduction. We had no kids and no home. On top of that, we were barely over the maximum income and were brutally phased out from deducting any of our student loan interest. It was horribly pathetic. We owed and we owed big time.

It did, however spur me onto bigger and better things. We filed our taxes on April 4, 2000. On April 21, 2000 we closed on our house. You can catch me unaware only once. After that, I wise up quickly.

But we didn’t start paying our mortgage until May and we had to liquify a bunch of assets to make the down payment and closing costs and so, when April rolled around last year, we still owed. Not enough house payments, too much capital gains tax. This made me very very very grumpy. In a fit of rage, I readjusted our withholdings and had extra money subtracted each month. I then promptly forgot about this.

Until this weekend.

This weekend, we ran the taxes again and are getting a refund of $7,000. That’s right, seven big ones! I’m not sure how or why and I’m not going to ask too many questions. You see, I have a plan. A beautiful, ChrissieTerry original plan.

I say, we get our big fat refund check and fly to Vegas. Then we place the whole enchilada on red and let it ride. If we lose, no big deal. It’s money we already thought we’d lost to the government anyway. We’ve lived without it so far. But if we win…….. If we win, I can give the pool boy that raise he deserves. (Whoops, hope Kevin isn’t reading this!)

Kevin, however, isn’t so hip on the idea. His Vegas experience so far has consisted of putting money on the table, losing it all, putting more money on the table, losing it all, emptying out his checking account, losing it all, etc, etc, etc. He’s probably right. Sigh. Ah well, maybe if I ask really nice he’ll let me fondle our refund check for a day or two before I have to put it in the bank. Man, it sure is tough being an adult.

The Great Danish Heist

We like to buy the danish pack from Costco. These packs come with twelve danishes. The three flavors, in order of Chrissie preference are, apple, blueberry and cherry. The cherry ones are, in my opinion, too tart and so I leave them to Kevin who (as far as I can tell) has no danish preference whatsoever. This means that the standing rule in our house is no one gets to eat the apple danishes except for me. Simple rule, no? Well, this weekend it was horribly violated.

Picture it. Sunday morning, 9:30am, Kevin is up and about while I am catching up on my beauty sleep. Hungry, Kevin decides to bring up a danish pack from the freezer in the basement. He rips it open and removes a non-apple danish. (What a guy!) He is, however, in a rush as he wants to hit Home Depot before the crowds and so he leaves the open flat of danishes in the kitchen and heads out the door. So far, no violation of the danish rule, right? Bear with me, its coming.

Kevin shops for wood, I sleep like the dead, and unbeknownst to either of us, the great danish tragedy is underway.

Kevin returns from Home Depot to find that someone has ripped into the danish supply. Three of the four apple danishes are completely gone. Gobbled up no doubt without a speck of evidence left behind. However, there are two partially eaten cherry danishes still on the ground. Upon closer inspection, Kevin realized that the culprit had carefully eaten around the cherry filling, nibbling only the outer pastry, and leaving that cherry remains strewn across the kitchen floor. Oddly enough, the blueberry danishes went untouched.

The culprit was easily located on the sofa. When confronted, he confessed all, rolling onto his back, exposing his now engorged belly, tail beating wildly, ears back, with a very sad – I’m-so-sorry-but-I’m-just-a-dog-and-you-shouldn’t-have-tempted-me-by-leaving-them-open-and-within-my-reach look.

And so, when I rolled out of bed at eleven or so looking, I might say, quite beautiful, Kevin had to break the bad news. From the fresh pack of twelve danishes, only six survived that morning and a mere one apple left. The danish rule was horribly violated. But really, I can’t blame Artie. The apples are, by far, the best tasting of the group. My dog has good taste, I’ll give him that.

Back Again!

Didja miss me? I know Artie did. Poor fat sausage. He thought we had left him forever to be ruled by the Melo puppy. He’s still a little discombobulated. Either that or living with Kat & Josh was so good he’s sad to be back. He has, however, reclaimed the sofa as his own and was bossing the cats around last night so I think he’ll recover.

It was worth it though. Elmo flew into town Sat morning and we packed up and headed for Mt. Bachelor for a little Spring skiing. It was beautiful. Sunny, warm, with no new snow but a nice base and few people. Amazingly, the old man managed to keep up with Kevin and I without breaking something. We’ve been taking this trip for, man, over seven years or so and we have it down to an artform.

The best part is that Kevin and Elmo get to hang out together. Since we are stranded up here in Portland, my parents only come up few times each year. So the entire weekend, Kevin keep looking at my dad and exclaiming, “So that’s were she got that from!”

Kevin says that when he was contemplating the big M, he was told to look to the mother before marrying the daughter. So he scoped out JT and like what he saw. Smart, caring, sweet, loving….based on this, he popped the question. Little did he know that in my family, the saying goes look to the father before marrying the daughter. What can I say? I’m a chip of my dad’s shoulder. I’m a teaser and a card shark just like my old man.

Oh yes, Kevin has a new nickname. Marshmellow. However, like most of my nicknames, this one is best used when you have a very clear line of escape. (But the look on his face is worth it.)

We have decided that next year, our annual ski trip will be in Colorado. Look out Beanie! Here we come!!