I’m heading out to see the Return of the King (or, according to Kevin, ROTK). Kevin saw it opening night with Josh while I stayed home with the kid so today I turn the tables and head to the theatre with Todd to watch the final installment on the big screen.<\/p>\n
So this morning, over breakfast, Kevin decided to prep me for the big viewing. Knowing I’m a bit fuzzy on the whole trilogy fine points, Kevin decided to lay a little foundation to help me through this movie.<\/p>\n
“OK,” he began after he finished his sausage “you remember Gondor, right?”<\/p>\n
“Um,” I stalled for time as I racked my brain, “which one was he?”<\/p>\n
Kevin’s jaw dropped and his eyes rolled around their sockets. Clearly this was the wrong answer.<\/p>\n
“Gondor is a place<\/i> not a person<\/i> Chrissie.” With an exasperated sigh he reached for a pencil and scrap paper. “OK, you remember Rohan, right? And where the orcs lived? Well next to them and across the blah blah blah blah.”<\/p>\n
I swear I had a Charlie Brown moment. Kevin was speaking but I couldn’t focus. I could feel my eyes glazing over and my mind begin to drift. Could be some early form of adult ADD but I’m not sure.<\/p>\n
“Signal fires…blah blah blah…orc attacks..blah blah blah.”<\/p>\n
I must have managed to kept my eyes open and nod in all the right places because there was suddenly silence and Kevin was looking at me, expectantly.<\/p>\n
“Right, got it,” I jumped in “Gondor is a place and there are signal fires.” I smiled hopefully and glanced at the clock. Amazingly, Kevin’s whole lecture only lasted 5 minutes. I could have sworn it was longer.<\/p>\n
“So, when’s a good time to take a pee break during the film?” I ventured, hopefully.<\/p>\n
I guess this wasn’t the question Kevin was hoping for because he got up and cleared the plates muttering something about people not appreciating the true brilliance the Tolkien realm.<\/p>\n
Yup, can’t wait! Mordor…place not person. Got it!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I’m heading out to see the Return of the King (or, according to Kevin, ROTK). Kevin saw it opening night with Josh while I stayed home with the kid so today I turn the tables and head to the theatre with Todd to watch the final installment on the big screen. So this morning, over […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-530","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2Kqhb-8y","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/530","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=530"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/530\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=530"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=530"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.chrissierocks.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=530"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}